However over the past few weeks weight has been on my mind. Just the in's and outs, ups and downs and the struggles. With 1 out of 3 adults in America falling into the range of "Obese" it's a scary world when it comes to weight. Especially when you put the judgements and criticisms on top of that.
Sometimes I feel that people think that I am lazy and that is why I am the size I am. Before I had my lapband surgery my doctor told me that I am the "Most FIT FAT person" she had ever met. I know that struggle with weight runs in my family, although you would never know that if you met my mother. But over the last few years I have come to realize that between genetics, metabolism and lifestyle it's like the odds are stacked against me.
Only one of those do I have complete control over to change--and that is lifestyle. Now it's hard to admit, but this can be scary to change. I vividly remember the first time I drove up to a gym at my highest weight. I cried in the car not wanting to go in because I knew nothing about a gym. I had been a band geek in high school-I didn't know how to use any of the equipment and the 5 seconds of instruction the gentleman at the gym gave me was NO help at all. It was just way too overwhelming. I called two people who told me to suck it up and go inside. The thing is....the longer I sat in the car the worse it got. I learned that day that although I get uncomfortable I just have to make myself do things.
Much of this is the reason my 30 in 30 list was created. I honestly have let my weight hold me back in life. I haven't done things I have wanted to do and I think in many ways-that has kept me from being or becoming the person I want to be. I want to be outdoors, adventurous, and sspontaneous!
I recently read an article that talked about weight and how many people with weight issues also have emotional issues. Here is an excerpt:
“If I lose weight, how will people know how that I am in pain?” So lamented a patient to Deannie Jennings, director of the clinical programs at my weight clinic. Deannie repeats the lament often, because it seems to express a message often sent by what she calls the “language of obesity.” Inside the fat, someone is probably in pain, and in a morbidly obese person, the pain may be close to intolerable. So, the next time you see an obese person, try offering compassion. Who knew? We fat people have feelings, too.
http://fitbie.msn.com/2011/09/26/do-americans-hate-fat-people-fight-prejudice-against-overweight?gt1=50002
I think that much of this is true-however I can say that as I have changed that even though I might be better emotionally it doesn't mean that the weight is just dropping off. Which in turn does affect me emotionally-"cyclical" is the hardest part of breaking weight issues. It's like you have to wake up daily and make a commitment that no matter what the scale says or how tight your pants may be-that you are going to love yourself enough to not fall into that cycle.
I encourage everyone to work daily on breaking the cycle. And if you aren't able to today, don't beat yourself up over it. We are human, will make mistakes or miss the mark, just wake up tomorrow and try again!
Have a great day! And don't forget to laugh! Laughter makes life better!
